Homer Simpson in Season 4, New Kids on the Block can tell you all you really need to know about Don Quixote:
Homer: This is my quest. I’m like that guy. That Spanish guy.
You know, he fought the windmill…
Marge: Don Quixote?
Homer: No, that’s not it. What’s-his-name, the Man of La Mancha.
Marge: Don Quixote.
Homer: No!
Marge: I really think that was the character’s name. Don Quixote.
Homer: Fine! I’ll look it up! [heads off and consults a reference]
Marge: [annoyed] Well, who was it?
Homer: [quietly fuming] Never mind.
I’m much more interested in his servant, Sancho Panza.
About Sancho
- His boss is an idiot
- but he gets a paycheck
- and potentially an island, but that will probably never happen
- like when someone promises you you’ll get a share of a company someday
- if it’s ever publicly traded
- like that, only the 1605 equivalent.
- and Sancho doesn’t have much better to do
- so he goes along with it
His problem?
- Has to follow his idiot boss around
- while riding a little donkey
- as Don Quixote runs around and tries to prove his little boy jerkoff dreams of heroism
Sexxi Points
- You can hear how annoyed he is when he’s talking to Don Quixote
- it’s like that Dilbert, “I’m mocking you and you are too stupid to get it” style
- He writes home to his wife
- and is faithful to her while he follows his boss around and makes sure he doesn’t die.
- He’s the practical one asking all the real questions, like “what are you doing?”
- and “when am I getting paid?”
- and “what are you doing?”
- in the end, he’s just a working dude who can’t get a break
Boner-Killers
- His last name indicates that he has a belly
- so his body is likely not great.
- Kind of passive, I was craving that moment when he just gets tired of it all
- and quits and destroys everything
- Office Space style
The Verdict?
He’s funny and practical, but these two things never gave me an orgasm. Get a little more ambition and yell at your boss for attacking windmills, and then we’re in business. Rating: POTENTIALLY SEXXI.